EVEN WITH ZERO INTEREST IN ALBANIA YOU WILL LOVE THIS BOOK

Even if you have no interest in Albania, you will love this book. The short and  funny stories will keep you laughing through- out no matter which country you come from. And do not let the sub-title fool you because although Mother Teresa and Skanderberg are mentioned, this book has nothing to do with them.

Written by an outsider who stumbled upon this country quite unexpectedly, it depicts the truth about present day Albania while dispelling the often exaggerated negative things the media fixates on. It is a wonderful and easy read that I enjoyed. The choice of narrator was A BIG SURPRISE and yet it fits so well. Some have compared this book to Borat, I chose to disagree, because the stories in this book are real.

Sa prej jush janë kurioz rreth magjise se zeze, Voodo apo besimet supernatyrale? Ky liber eshte nje histori e vertete melodrame qe nuk flet vetem per magjine e zeze, por gjithashtu edhe sesi MAGJIA E ZEZE eshte shkencerisht e mundur permes Epigjenetikes. Ka gjithashtu detaje te mizorive te kryera nga britaniket dhe kolonite e tyre. Eshte lloji i librit qe te mban zgjuar deri ne 2 te mengjesit ndersa ndjek fuqine e perpjekjeve mes Makenes dhe burrit te saj Kanoro qe rezulton te kete pasoja te tmerrshme per familjen e tyre.
Shpresoj qe ta shijoni kete histori aq shume sa une.

Ky liber eshte gjithashtu i disponueshem ne Tirane.

https://www.google.com/maps/place/Libraria+Tirana+Times/@41.3208202,19.8128825,15z/data=!4m5!3m4!1s0x0:0xc3829c7913bfdbb5!8m2!3d41.3208202!4d19.8128825

https://www.amazon.com/Hija-nemit-Albanian-L-Bono/dp/1548219452/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1537276550&sr=8-1&keywords=hija+e+nemit

Dieses Buch ist ein Muss für jeden, der auch nur das geringste Interesse an Albanien hat. EL Bono sagt zu Beginn, dass er Albanien so beschreiben könnte, dass man nie einen Schritt in das Land setzen möchte oder so, dass eure nächste Reise unbedingt nach Albanien führt. Aber wie für jedes Land auf der Welt gibt es Positives und Negatives zu berichten, aber leider konzentriert sich die westliche Presse fast nur auf das Negative und malt Albanien als mafiöses, gefährliches und schreckliches Land. Das ist aber weit von der Wahrheit entfernt.

Nachdem ich in London und Wien gelebt habe, und nun schon selbst ein langjähriger Bewohner Albaniens bin, kann ich bestätigen, dass es eines der sichersten Länder der Welt ist, das ich kenne. Besonders als Frau gibt es kaum eine andere Stadt als Tirana in der ich mich allein in einer dunklen Gasse, alleine zu später Nacht, nicht fürchten muss.

E.L Bono beschreibt Albanien als einen Rohdiamant mit einem enormen Entwicklungspotenzial. Das Buch ist kurzweilig und humorvoll unterhaltsam geschrieben. Während er sich mit Ironie über die eine oder andere uns komsich erscheinende Eigenart lustig macht, erzählt er uns genau so von den positiven Dingen in Albanien, wie z.B. der fantastischen Bio-Küche (auch wenn das Land zwischen Kroatien und Griechenland liegt, übertrifft die Kulinarik sicher ihre kühnsten Erwartungen) , der unberührten Natur, oder der grenzenloses Freundlichkeit und Hilfsbereitschaft der Albaner.

Ich erinnere mich an eine englische Zeitung, die eine ganze Seite darüber geschrieben hat, wie man den Kontakt mit Touristen vermeiden kann (man erkennt sie an den Stadtplänen und Reuiseführern in den Händen). In Albanien werden sie niemanden finden, der ihnen nicht sofort weiterhelfen wird. Selbst wenn er nicht ihre Sprache versteht, holt er sofort jemanden der Englisch, Italienisch, Deutsch, Griechisch oder sonst eine Sprache beherrscht.

Aber vielleicht ist es das Beste für Sie, wenn dieses unterhaltsame, ehrliche und unvoreingenommene Buch, das Albanien aus dem Blickwinkel eines Zentraleuropäers beschreibt, selbst lesen. Ich denke, dieses Buch wird sie direkt nach Albanien führen, schließlich ist das eigene Erlebnis immer noch der beste Eindruck..

There was a lady called Lucy who had who two sons, John was 18 years old and a little bit lazy while Mike was 15 years old and had started drinking, taking drugs and stealing little things in shops. Lucy said John was a little slow in his thinking and just needed a little help from mummy. I chose to differ and spoke to John. He said “My needs are small, I need food, cigarettes, drinks, a place to sleep and clothes. My mum takes care of the clothes, food and board. My girlfriend covers the drinks and cigarettes, why should I work.” I spoke to John emphasizing that mummy may not always be around and as a man he needed to do something because allowing the girl to pay gave her control over him and, what happens when the girl has enough of a deadbeat boyfriend?. He agreed to do a kind of internship where he got paid as he learnt. Turns out he was not slow at all, between mum and the girl, they took care of his needs.

The younger boy Mike was a little more challenging, his mum bought him a new phone every month because he could not or would not take care of his phones and why should he? Mummy was on standby to buy the next latest gadget but! To reach him, she had to call his friends because he did not answer calls from mum and only called her when he got in trouble. Then troubles with the law begun. This was not a onetime deal. In a drunken state, he hit someone with a bottle and this person ended up in hospital. While the guy was in hospital and case was in court, his mum bailed him out and he did it again. When we got to court, I discovered he had hit someone else in full confidence that his mum would take care of it. I spoke to his mum and said “Let him learn his lesson. They will send him to prison for two months. Do not send money or visit him, let him know there are consequences to his behavior. She accused me of not caring because I did not have a kid at that time. So she gave him money, visited and did all the things that we do for love. She paid a lawyer and Mike was released a short time later and ordered to pay a fine or go to prison. His mum gave him the money to pay the fine. He took the money and spent it on a ticket to watch a famous Superstar rapper. Now why did he do that? According to his mum “He is a kid and does not know what he is doing, he needs a little more love and guidance” So she took more money and went to pay the fine with him. “According to me, Mike had no intention of going to prison because of the fine. He knew that even if he spends the money, mum will give him more because she will not let her little boy go to prison.”

Mike had learnt his lesson and had learnt it well. Mum could and would fix everything. Mum took responsibility for all his actions. His mother thought she was saving him, I think she ruined him. Today Mike 26, he is an alcoholic junkie who spends more time in prison than out.

Abdul’s case was different. When he was 17 years old, he took his father’s car without a license or permission and got arrested for speeding. When he got to jail, he called his dad. Dad told him “I am sure that when you took the car, you had plan on how to fix any problem, so do it and get out of jail. Just like you took the car without me, fix this without me. His dad let him sit in jail for three days before he bailed him out. Needless to say, Abdul never did that again. He is now a doctor. He learnt that dad might not fix everything and that there were consequences to his actions.

Robert the last born in his family and now the now the only son, also learnt that mum would move heaven and earth to fix all his problems. While he did not tangle too much with the law, he learnt that mum provides food, clothes, money and that so useful telephone. Even his sister paid for his wedding. When one government almost deported him for something silly he could have avoided, another sister paid for his lawyer. Robert is a very talented young man. I would go so far as to say, he is gifted. He composes music and is also brilliant with lyrics not to mention that he can sing too, and rap. I remember a song he wrote for his daughter called ‘You And Me Against The World’. A brilliant song that touched my heart. BUT!!!! Robert is a drunk who never really tried to stop drinking. This young man lives in a land of opportunity where alcoholism is an accepted illness. They offer treatment for free but Robert is not interested. His needs are taken care of and the music he makes occasionally is rotting in some keyboard in his sister’s flat. Robert now has a 15 year old daughter. He is 38 years old. Between his mother and his wife, all his needs are taken care of. His mum gives him money, buys some of his food, buys all his clothes including his underwear, buys his phones and pays his phone bills while his wife takes care of the rest. He has not worked at all in any capacity since when was 18. He drinks everyday but not enough to for a knockout, he cannot afford it.  I spoke to his mum and said that sometimes you need to hit rock bottom in order to get back up. Truth is, blinded by too much love, her son can do no wrong. And as for Robert, why should he try to change his life?

Now I know that sometimes we want to solve all our children’s problems, but how will they learn to do it without us. I recently heard something in a movie.

A MAN WHO HAS NOT PREPARED THEIR CHILD FOR THEIR OWN DEATH HAS NOT DONE THEIR JOB.  Sonisays’ we must prepare our child to be without us because fate willing, we will go before them. What will happen to them if we die? Of course we should help our children but we have to draw the line somewhere. Sometimes when they fall we have to let them pick themselves up so they can learn how to do it. When babies are learning to walk, they fall quite often. But! we let them keep trying until they learn to stand and walk. If our solution was to carry them so they never fall and get hurt, then they would never learn to stand or walk.

We must do more to keep our children from being the prisoners of tomorrow.

Our children must learn from their mistakes. Once may be a mistake and we should help. But three times is a habit. Maybe I speak too soon because my daughter is young but only time will tell. I hope when that time comes, I will not be blinded by too much love which so often destroys that what it wants to save.

Any and all thoughts are welcome. If you like my blog please FOLLOW AND SHARE.

Dieses Buch ist ein Muss für jeden, der auch nur das geringste Interesse an Albanien hat. EL Bono sagt zu Beginn, dass er Albanien so beschreiben könnte, dass man nie einen Schritt in das Land setzen möchte oder so, dass eure nächste Reise unbedingt nach Albanien führt. Aber wie für jedes Land auf der Welt gibt es Positives und Negatives zu berichten, aber leider konzentriert sich die westliche Presse fast nur auf das Negative und malt Albanien als mafiöses, gefährliches und schreckliches Land. Das ist aber weit von der Wahrheit entfernt.

Nachdem ich in London und Wien gelebt habe, und nun schon selbst ein langjähriger Bewohner Albaniens bin, kann ich bestätigen, dass es eines der sichersten Länder der Welt ist, das ich kenne. Besonders als Frau gibt es kaum eine andere Stadt als Tirana in der ich mich allein in einer dunklen Gasse, alleine zu später Nacht, nicht fürchten muss.

E.L Bono beschreibt Albanien als einen Rohdiamant mit einem enormen Entwicklungspotenzial. Das Buch ist kurzweilig und humorvoll unterhaltsam geschrieben. Während er sich mit Ironie über die eine oder andere uns komsich erscheinende Eigenart lustig macht, erzählt er uns genau so von den positiven Dingen in Albanien, wie z.B. der fantastischen Bio-Küche (auch wenn das Land zwischen Kroatien und Griechenland liegt, übertrifft die Kulinarik sicher ihre kühnsten Erwartungen) , der unberührten Natur, oder der grenzenloses Freundlichkeit und Hilfsbereitschaft der Albaner.

Ich erinnere mich an eine englische Zeitung, die eine ganze Seite darüber geschrieben hat, wie man den Kontakt mit Touristen vermeiden kann (man erkennt sie an den Stadtplänen und Reuiseführern in den Händen). In Albanien werden sie niemanden finden, der ihnen nicht sofort weiterhelfen wird. Selbst wenn er nicht ihre Sprache versteht, holt er sofort jemanden der Englisch, Italienisch, Deutsch, Griechisch oder sonst eine Sprache beherrscht.

Aber vielleicht ist es das Beste für Sie, wenn dieses unterhaltsame, ehrliche und unvoreingenommene Buch, das Albanien aus dem Blickwinkel eines Zentraleuropäers beschreibt, selbst lesen. Ich denke, dieses Buch wird sie direkt nach Albanien führen, schließlich ist das eigene Erlebnis immer noch der beste Eindruck..

When I was growing up, sex was a taboo subject in both mine, and other peoples families. No one spoke about it; that subject was left to the teacher in the sex education class. For some that information was too little too late.

For example, some girls were petrified when they got their periods, they did not know what it was and many of them thought that they were dying.

Some got pregnant; the parents asked “How is that possible, she does not even know about sex?

Some had encountered Uncle Jack who said: “Let’s play hide the sausage, it is our secret and you can have an endless supply of candy”.

Some contacted sexually transmitted disease like Hepatitis and yet for other’s, when AIDS came, it was a death sentence that may have been avoided by simply having a conversation. Imagine watching your child die slowly and painfully knowing you could have done something about it?

When death comes knocking, no one gives a shit about what the neighbors will say because they are too consumed by grief. But yet, at that time, it was still kept a secret and the other kids in family would be told she died of malaria and not a sexually transmitted disease.

When I first moved to Albania, one 19 year old girl asked me if it was possible to get pregnant the first time you have sex. I was shocked but the longer I stayed in the country, the more it occurred to me that that question was not stupid, it was common because the girls simply did not know. When they were 15, they were told “do not be with boys, you could get pregnant which would bring shame to our family.”

The more I spoke to young girls, the more I found skeletons in the closets; the neighbor who touched her vagina when she went to deliver milk, the uncle who stuck his finger in her vagina when mum and dad were not around, and let us not forget the ignorant boys who wanted to experiment with no idea of the consequences.

Yes, when the girls hit the teens they were warned about boys but when they were even younger, were they warned about adults? Because that is the biggest danger.

I do not use the word “shame” in my family. My daughter is 7 years old and she is allowed to ask me anything even about sex- I told her all about human reproduction, we looked at books and talked about different parts of our bodies and their functions. We spoke about what was normal and what wasn’t and I told her that men and women and boys were not allowed to look at or touch her vagina. I made it clear to her that people who did that or wanted to do that were evil and should be resisted and reported to me immediately.

Now you may think that is going overboard because my child is too young but paedophiles depend on innocence to get to their prey. They count on taboo stopping a child from speaking of such matters and they tell the children that no one will believe them if they speak out. MY CHILD KNOWS I WILL BELIEVE HER.  When we do not educate our children because it is considered SHAMEFUL, we leave to it to others who may not be well meaning or yet others who are just as ignorant, to do it for us. And I am not just speaking about girls, I am speaking about boys too. Not all the Catholic priests who abused boys were gay, rather they picked the boys because the boys were less likely to tell because they would be too embarrassed.

Lately I have read in the news about men who target single mothers simply because they have a sexual interest in their child. These men are a dream, they buy you flowers and chocolate, they clean and cook for you, finally encouraging you to have a night out with friends while they babysit and God help your child after that. So you come and your child’s personality has changed overnight and you let the man explain the change. Why not ask the kid?

Sonisays’ we must talk to our children about sex and their bodies. We must encourage them to talk to us and to ask questions. We should answer the questions as honestly as possible because information will help your child to see the danger signs. As he all she grows older we should give more and more information and we should tell boys and girls about sexually transmitted diseases and how to protect one-self from such things. We have to talk about the burden (NOT THE SHAME) of unwanted pregnancies on young people. IF telling young people not to have sex worked, that would be great but, we encourage boys to do it and discourage girls from doing it, so who do the boys have sex with? Old women? No, they do it with the young girls.

In the 20^th century we must advice young people on the benefits of contraception. That info can save us all a lot of grief as well as saving lives. It is not unheard that a young lady kills an unwanted child or kills herself. Given the choice between shame and my daughter’s life, I would choose shame every time. People will always talk negative things about you regardless of how good you think you are.

TALK ABOUT SEX. DO NOT MAKE IT A TABOO IN YOUR HOME. IF YOU DON’T TALK ABOUT IT, YOUR CHILD WILL STILL GET THAT INFORMATION, BUT IT MAY COME FROM AN EVIL SELF SERVING BASTARD.

Should we have sex before marriage? Watch this space.

Dieses Buch ist ein Muss für jeden, der auch nur das geringste Interesse an Albanien hat. EL Bono sagt zu Beginn, dass er Albanien so beschreiben könnte, dass man nie einen Schritt in das Land setzen möchte oder so, dass eure nächste Reise unbedingt nach Albanien führt. Aber wie für jedes Land auf der Welt gibt es Positives und Negatives zu berichten, aber leider konzentriert sich die westliche Presse fast nur auf das Negative und malt Albanien als mafiöses, gefährliches und schreckliches Land. Das ist aber weit von der Wahrheit entfernt.

Nachdem ich in London und Wien gelebt habe, und nun schon selbst ein langjähriger Bewohner Albaniens bin, kann ich bestätigen, dass es eines der sichersten Länder der Welt ist, das ich kenne. Besonders als Frau gibt es kaum eine andere Stadt als Tirana in der ich mich allein in einer dunklen Gasse, alleine zu später Nacht, nicht fürchten muss.

E.L Bono beschreibt Albanien als einen Rohdiamant mit einem enormen Entwicklungspotenzial. Das Buch ist kurzweilig und humorvoll unterhaltsam geschrieben. Während er sich mit Ironie über die eine oder andere uns komsich erscheinende Eigenart lustig macht, erzählt er uns genau so von den positiven Dingen in Albanien, wie z.B. der fantastischen Bio-Küche (auch wenn das Land zwischen Kroatien und Griechenland liegt, übertrifft die Kulinarik sicher ihre kühnsten Erwartungen) , der unberührten Natur, oder der grenzenloses Freundlichkeit und Hilfsbereitschaft der Albaner.

Ich erinnere mich an eine englische Zeitung, die eine ganze Seite darüber geschrieben hat, wie man den Kontakt mit Touristen vermeiden kann (man erkennt sie an den Stadtplänen und Reuiseführern in den Händen). In Albanien werden sie niemanden finden, der ihnen nicht sofort weiterhelfen wird. Selbst wenn er nicht ihre Sprache versteht, holt er sofort jemanden der Englisch, Italienisch, Deutsch, Griechisch oder sonst eine Sprache beherrscht.

Aber vielleicht ist es das Beste für Sie, wenn dieses unterhaltsame, ehrliche und unvoreingenommene Buch, das Albanien aus dem Blickwinkel eines Zentraleuropäers beschreibt, selbst lesen. Ich denke, dieses Buch wird sie direkt nach Albanien führen, schließlich ist das eigene Erlebnis immer noch der beste Eindruck..

Some of these people simply do not like children. Others are just hostile sadistic people who prey on vulnerable kids to boost their ego. At best, some are apathetic and do not care one way or another about the welfare of our children and yet still there are others who simply forgot that they too were once kids and what being a kid felt like.

   Luckily for daughter, her teacher is not one of the above. Ms. Mather comes across as a serious but soft spoken individual with certain ease about her. Judging from the progress my daughter has made in her school work, I am convinced that Ms. Mather is not just a good teacher, she is a wonderful teacher. However what makes Ms. Mather and others like her that little bit extra special, is that she cares and not just about the books but about the general welfare of our children. And in case you are wondering, no, she is not my best friend and neither is my daughter the teacher’s pet. In fact Ms. Mather has been known admonish, reprimand or even give my kid acceptable punishment for making wrong choices.

 My daughter is one of three mixed race children in her school. One day she told me that a little girl had made her feel bad about her beautiful curly brown hair. Needless to say my daughter was upset, she wanted straight hair. As a mother, it broke my heart. My daughter is not only beautiful on the outside but she is also beautiful on the inside. She has a sunny disposition and one of very few kids that I know who wakes up with a smile on her face. I was never like that, waking up for school was a continuation of my nightmare. I spoke to my daughter and told her that her hair was beautiful. I told her that I loved her, I told she should love herself and generally we had a long and hopefully productive conversation. Having done my part, I then wrote a short note to Ms. Mather explaining the situation.

    Ms. Mather did not address my kid about this subject. Instead she found four kid’s books about different races, different skin colours, different families and most importantly different hair. Every two days or so, she read one book to her class, held a discussion about it and then sent the book home with my daughter so we could read it together and talk about it.

    Another time one boy would not work with my kid in class. I cannot say one hundred percent that this was race related, but it did amount to bullying of sorts. Although my daughter did not tell me about it, the teacher took this very seriously because she has zero tolerance on bullying and believes it must be nipped in the bud. She sent the boy out of the class and called his parents for a meeting. She also sent me an e-mail to say what had happened and how she had dealt it.  A few weeks later something similar happened, this time with a different boy who pushed my girl. Again my daughter did not mention it but the teacher wrote to me and explained how she dealt with that issue also.

    In some cases, at least in my case, my daughter spends more of her waking hours in school than she does at home. It therefore gives me great comfort to know that someone has her back.  Sadly my daughter is going to 2^nd grade and will leave Ms. Mather behind. I can only hope that the next teacher is inclined.

   I applaud you and others like you Ms. Mather, hopefully because of you, the leaders of tomorrow; our children, will not only be better academics but also well balanced people who choose right instead of wrong.